This is just to say
I’m still alive, and kicking
Notwithstanding all the stresses
Caused by the thing called life.
Life after June,
I’m not really ready for you, to be very honest.
This is just to say
I’m still alive, and kicking
Notwithstanding all the stresses
Caused by the thing called life.
Life after June,
I’m not really ready for you, to be very honest.
Before my out-of-nowhere affection towards the song Vanilla Twilight dissolve any further (which I don’t think it’ll likely be), I deem it best I write down how I became so attached to this beautifully and carefully crafted masterpiece. =]
Strange how thing can turn around when you least expect them to be. I wasn’t a fan of this song or Owl City initially, but you never know what happens the next moment. And this song just hit home and *clicked* the next minute you’re still conscious you realized you’ve already set half foot in it. Beauty of music? Emm… At first few hearing, I thought the song is about nothing more than a funny guy trying to voice out his feeling on a broken or long-distance relationship. I was more intrigued by the meaning of the song title itself and for some reasons, I can’t help my artsy box tickling with the words in the song. After closely going through the lyric, things indeed don’t seem like as they are on the surface – just another mistake I made, all these while. So I did some research on the song.
To make long story short, Adam Young (the guy behind Owl City) apparently wrote this song for his girlfriend, who unfortunately passed away in a car crash. From what I’ve gathered, Young also suffers from insomnia, he has difficulties falling asleep like normal people do. Although I suspect the credibility of the sources, I still give it the green light partly because it did make sense, assessing from some lines in the song really suggest that the song is actually made for his dead girlfriend. =[
You’ll see why and here’s my take on the song Vanilla Twilight by Owl City:
The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake I miss you
One of the few lines that touched me the most and such a melancholic opening. If the stars would lean down and kiss you, what could it probably mean if not taking away the girl from Earth, leaving someone moments of tranquility, or perhaps in some sense, despair. Definitely not just another ordinary sweet talk that a boy would text a girl, it’s different here.
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere
‘Cause I’ll doze off safe and soundly
But I’ll miss your arms around me
“…heavy dose of atmosphere” could suggests the boy is hoping for a retreat from reality – he finds it hard to accept that someone he used to slept with (loved) left him and he feels no sense of security when she’s not around. In fact, the songwriter does suffer from insomnia and probably could only sleep well when his girlfriend is around.
I’d send a postcard to you, dear
‘Cause I wish you were here
Notice the “I’d (I Would)”? He wanted to send a postcard to her, but he knew he can’t. A postcard is a form of missing someone who is far away. He misses the girl so much and if the girl was still living somewhere on Earth, he knows where he should and will send the postcard, but NOT when the girl is somewhere at the afterlife. ='[
I’ll watch the night turn light blue
But it’s not the same without you
Because it takes two to whisper quietly
The boy and the girl might have had the habit or inclination of watching the night sky together while closely exchanging murmur to the each other.
The silence isn’t so bad
‘Til I look at my hands and feel sad
‘Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly
He tries to convince himself that he can get on but it only lasts for a fleeting moment and he starts to miss her again. Another wonderfully crafted lines that says it all – in a hopeless yet sorrowful manner.
I’ll find repose in new ways
Though I haven’t slept in two days
‘Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone
But drenched in vanilla twilight
I’ll sit on the front porch all night
Waist deep in thought because when I think of you
I don’t feel so alone
The boy knows he has to get back on track sooner or later, but “cold nostalgia” always has a place in his heart and he can’t help but influenced by the affectionate feeling he had for the past. What actually does “Vanilla Twilight” means? I found myself pondering the basic question from the beginning until now. I’m going to blend them down to three anyway. So:
1. It could be simply a tender name or a quality (twilight soaked with vanilla) that the boy and the girl used to shared and valued
2. Vanilla is viewed as something that is inviting (perhaps twilight soaked with vanilla led the songwriter thought of their situation, hence the title “Vanilla Twilight”)
3. A beautiful tale in the past about a dying young couple led to the existence of vanilla orchid in Mexico where the Aztecs lived. Since then, the Aztecs regard the plant as a symbol of strength (“…drenched in vanilla twilight” kind of indicates when the boy was surrounded by vanilla twilight it gives the boy the courage and it makes the boy feels better)
As many times as I blink I’ll think of you tonight
I’ll think of you tonight
My favourite line. As the songwriter is insomniac (he wishes to sleep soundly but he couldn’t do that) he’ll think of her whenever he closes his eyes.
When violet eyes get brighter
And heavy wings grow lighter
I’ll taste the sky and feel alive again
And I’ll forget the world that I knew
But I swear I won’t forget you
Here’s another amazing lines. The boy remains sanguine about the way he’s dealing with the issue. With the right amount of time, the boy will finally offload things he has been shouldering all the while and move on again. “And heavy wings grow lighter” on another note could also signifies his dead girlfriend is slowly becoming an angel. He’ll never forget the angel he used to loved. =[
Oh if my voice could reach back through the past
I’d whisper in your ear
“Oh, darling I wish you were here”
The final lines are echoes of the entire sad story, which is soon intensified by a cozy melody that plays all the way to the end of the song, in my opinion. That melody just play automatically in your mind isn’t it?
That’s it basically, the story behind the song just snaps well with the lyric. That just explained why the hell in this world is this particular song really a something. Everybody is subjected to their own opinion. While you might not agree with what I say, you can’t deny that this is one delicate and miraculous song ever produced. Not forgetting, all shall be well, Jack shall have Jill.
***Do you know what is the best part about music? When you’re able to interpret the meaning of the song, relate it to your(our) life and when you can’t pause from listening to it, that’s music.***
How is your second semester? If you ask me, expect to hear replies like, “bad”, “not good”, “shitty”, “Huh, what?”
Second semester seems like somewhat never exist to me, from at the first to the last place. On the first week of semester restart, I skipped classes for a trip to the jungle until the final day of the week. Clearly it can’t be a good start. As ironic as it may sound, on the last (first) day of the week when I went back, there were others still not back from their holidays yet! (For whatever reason, the scene of the class cut half the amount of 50 students is still fresh like a pie coming out from oven in my memory until today) Just when I thought I was the only one who was doing all the bad deed (Methought skipping the first 3 days was anything more than enough to be sentenced to death – the others skipped the first whole week!).
On returning to study life, I was mercilessly bombarded by a series of endless literature journals and killing project. My instructor of that, known to me as Prof. Dr emilyROSwhitelephanthilLI, hybridly named after the title of short stories that he asked me to read, have successfully made it to be feeling like his subject was the only one I ever have to study for the rest of semester. Bravo.
I have to do the infamous entrepreneurship subject this semester. That was a baby, a huge baby to take care of! Almost succeeding like the literature subject in making me to feel like the only subject I ought to pay attention throughout the semester. I had to associate with others to run a business in the campus for four days, and having a demanding instructor for the subject made life more difficult. Everybody hated it, I hardly had any feeling toward it. Period.
On another note, I’ve always been suspicion toward the creditability of the faculty staff. They should learn to grow. Just tell if you don’t know who’s who and I wouldn’t have to stupidly knocking on the doors of those irrelevant who’s who only to find out that who’s who isn’t the right who’s who I wanted to find and finally landing myself in pile of shit with some rebuke from the head of department.
Driving, a pleasure, or a nightmare?
I now drive day in and day out to class as a consequence of not living in the filthiest, dirtiest, disgusting, awfully-and-terribly-run-by-private-company campus hostel any more. Distance is one thing, but I’m fine with it. 35km from home to class and another 35km from class back to home should be as smooth as saying XYZ backwardly. What poses problem is the rocket-rising rate of the vehicles on the road that causes massive traffic jam and the time toll that is taken. I don’t mind waking up early and going home late in order to avoid traffic jam, but what bothers me is the increasing temperature that is caused by the number of vehicles on the road everyday, especially during the afternoon. And I strongly agree with you Marc, if any of you think an increase of 1°c in average temperature is a small matter, then go fuck yourself!
I admit I am a turtle. I have extreme hatred for people who tailgate and close down me in a point-blank distance at the back of my car while I am already driving in the slow lane. Everytime I see it I feel like stepping real hard on the brake pedal without prior warning, and subsequently inviting the “tailgater” to lose control, not over their car but their urinary system. Thereby allowing me to have a good laugh at them. HA HA HA HA. I also hate people who speed like nobody’s business on the road. These people simply do not realize the danger of speeding. They do not have an inkling that speeding is often the cause of all the fatal accidents that happen everyday on the road. “Drive Responsibly”, two simple words that aren’t well-understand by many people. I found it to be very interesting watching a scene when fast moving car is forced to brake/slow down their vehicle in order to avoid crashing with car that moved away from their usual lane to the fast lane. To me those car that moved away from their lane are like angel lah, an act only stuntman will do, that is inviting driver who think they are driving a Formula One race car to brake suddenly and taking the risk of involving in a car crash.
Now, semester draws on! And holidays please don’t be late!
Now I could not care less already, someone please mark it an end for my semester. I do not want to be bothered any more by the all the academic stuff; seeing all the lecturers, dealing with difficult assignment partner, the banyak pattern academicians and so on. Hopefully this semester will not go the wrong way too badly.
Counting down the premiere of Kevin Cheng’s new drama is the most exciting thing to do after the countdown of Chinese New Year. The news have it that Kevin’s new drama, an ancient action series entitled A Fistful Of Stances, will be airing on the 17th of March 2010 at 2130 GMT. It is going to be the handful of ancient dramas that Kevin will be playing after the likes of Devil’s Disciples and Beyond The Realm Of Conscience. He has been subject to judgements such as being too stiff and showing lack of expressions especially in his characters in ancient series. However, in his new work, A Fistful Of Stances, there are something for everyone to expect of. The new kung fu series, A Fistful Of Stances, though set at a pre-modern setting, has been specially designed with modern qualities and added humour that will allow audience to enjoy the action and immerse into the scenes. Partnering with Kevin Cheng in the drama is Kenneth Ma. Initially, it was Raymond Lam who had been shortlisted for the role of another leading character but he was replaced due to certain reasons and it appeared Kenneth Ma will be the one who is taking over the role. Methought the selection of Kenneth is more likely to bring out the humourous effect that the series will be offering because of his merry personality. I will be looking forward to the partnership of these two popular names currently in the industry, and of course specifically, needless to say, Kevin Cheng. I bet I would be thrilled and overwhelmed because for long I had not breathe in new air since trapping myself in a fuming room watching Rex in Burning Flame III.
On another more (very) interesting note, Kevin Cheng is now working on another drama [Only You] that focuses on modern wedding as a theme. And what potentially attractive and irresistible is that Kevin Cheng will play the role of nothing more than a… WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER!!! Oh my goodness this is like something never in my wildest dreams that actually and in the very supposed fact to happen someone play me the music of sweet chin pleaseee excuse and forgive my run-on and comma splices sentences if there is any because it is hard to coordinate when I want to speak my mind the unprecedented feeling of excitement and I am very much countering myself because on one hand I hope it to be released to the surface as soon as possible and on the other hand I want to sink deep into the sea of waiting to feel the eventual worth.
The month of March according to my instinct if not wrong, is going to be eventful, when the 2009 Astro Wah Lai Toi Drama Awards, scheduled to be in end-March, going to be held at Genting Highlands. Forensic Heroes II, Last One Standing, The Ultimate Crime Fighter and The Seventh Day are the four works that Kevin was involved in which will be competing in the award ceremony, with Last One Standing particularly nominated for the Favourite Drama Award. Personally, Kevin was also nominated in the awards for Favourite On-Screen Couple with Charmaine Sheh in Forensic Heroes II and not forgetting, Favourite Male Actor in Last One Standing. If you like any of the nominated artistes in the impending award ceremony, support them when the voting is announced. I attended the similar function two years ago except it was held at Sunway Pyramid back at that time, you can see the photos of the artistes that attended the ceremony here and here. Quite a “starry” entry this is, I promise to show the photos if I am going to attend the award ceremony and until then, Happy Chap Goh Mei to you who are reading.
The USB flash drive is perhaps one of the most useful inventions ever created. A USB flash drive (thumb drive or some call it the PenDrive) acts like a removable storage disk which when plugged in to a PC will enable user to transfer files and documents in a no-sweat condition. I like the gadget because of its mobility and I can do transfer of my favorite and important files in a less hassling way. When I say “less hassling way” I mean there will be chance for a “very hassling way”, just like when I say “I disagree” I could mean “I actually agree” or “I agree with you a lot”. Do you notice when we are arguing we are constantly giving our own definition on an issue demanding the consent of others but in fact we do at the same time already have the mental knowledge or agreement inside of ourselves without realizing it. It is actually prescribed in us already. So tell me what is the point of debating? After all, the art of communication is you people are telling what I want to know but what I want to know is what is happening. Ok ok let us come back.
What is considered a “hassling way” then? That is when you start to play some random game and in the end of the game you realized you are in a hot trouble. One norm I notice is the prevalent and heavy application of the USB flash drive in our daily life. Most of the time we are unaware of the moment we plug in the USB flash drive into a PC we have high chances of contracting with malicious software. The malware normally make use of the AutoRun application (that is the small window that pops out asking what the user want to perform with the removable disk every time we connect it to a PC) by inserting codes during the process. The autorun file once executed will attack the PC. Your important assignment or favourite files might be at risk. Your personal information might be leaked. You have to re-install your system. Now that is hassle.
Do you know holding down the [shift] key when inserting removable media will run the AutoPlay? If you do not want the trouble of holding down the button every time you might as well deselect the AutoPlay by going to the Hardware and Sound settings in the Control Panel. There is also a more complicated way of doing this that is by editing your registry files. You can try all the mentioned solutions yourself by searching related information on how to disable AutoRun as the following row is going to be spared for a software that I would like to share with you – TrueCrypt.
I think this is an enormously useful software. As the name suggest the software encrypts disk. Simply put, your files will be protected by a password. You can also apply the idea to protect your USB flash drive by encrypting it and at the same time malware will not be able to write codes onto your drive (with the condition that you already fulfilled all the empty spaces in your drive). The software also comes with a traveler mode you can install onto your USB flash drive, in case you want to use it on a PC which have no TrueCrypt installed. So how does this work? After the installation, you can start creating volume (that is the file containing the encrypted virtual disk). But before that if you want to encrypt your USB flash drive, remember to setup a traveler mode onto your USB flash drive first (Tools > Traveler Disk Setup > select your root directory).
To create a volume, click “Next” until you are asked the location of volume. If you want to encrypt your USB flash drive, select your USB flash drive location and name it. Continue with “Next” until you are asked to decide the size of volume. If you are creating a volume for your USB flash drive I recommend the usage of a byte converter (it is available on the internet) to calculate the exact space in your drive. That way you can obtain optimum space allocation on your drive (that is your drive will show “0 byte of free space” when encryption is done). After that you will be prompted to create a password. The final stage would be formatting your newly created volume.
Open up your USB flash drive when you are done with formatting and you will see something like this (I created 2 files with different size allocated to each).
To open up your file, select the file created earlier in the Volume column and choose from any of the available free drives above (that will be the virtual location of your encrypted disk). You will be prompted your password in order to open it.
After inserting the correct password, you will see the file is opened in the selected free drive. Double-click on the free drive to access your encrypted disk. You can now start to do normal transferring. Oh yeah, check out your “My Computer”, you will see an extra drive, that is your real-time virtual encrypted disk (simply your volume). If you are done with transferring, to stop, simply click “Dismount”, exit TrueCrypt, and safely remove your USB flash drive. Beware, removing the USB flash drive without dismounting might cause data loss or damage to your drive.
The whole thing is utilized based two ideas, that is firstly your USB flash drive is now fully written, in other word there is no extra space for any malicous code to be written on to your device and secondly outsider will not be able to access your USB flash drive as you will need the correct password. Now you get it. It is not that complicated to use, and believe it or not it is going to be very useful.